Mavs Game Top 10

Ed lucked into four terrific tickets to the Mavs/Suns game last night (6th row behind the Suns bench).  Ed, Eric, Trevor, and I attended.  It was a great game that the Mavs ended up winning 107-97 thanks to some great play by Dirk and Kidd.  Even though the action on the floor was fantastic, it was the off-the-court antics that were the most entertaining.  I have decided to do a recap of the night by highlighting my top ten moments of outing:

10.  Chad Kroeger's brother sitting right in fornt of us.  Seriously, he looked exactly like him.  He was one of the douchiest people I have ever seen.  Oh and his gf had sparkly extensions in here hair.  They were an awful couple.

9.  Seeing Ndamukong Suh sitting courtside behind the basket.  Ed telling me that I pronounced Ndamukong Suh's name wrong.  First of all, 97.5% of the U.S. population can't pronounce his name.  Second, I had consumed a few beers.  Third, Ed acted like he had no idea who I was talking about because I had slightly mispronounced his name.  I mean how many people's names are even close to that?  Whatever, it was cool to see a top NFL draft pick.

8.  Watching Trevor point out all of the hookers in the arena.  I have to say, I was somewhat oblivious to the number of hookers in Dallas.  And if they are not hookers, they are doing a great job of looking and acting like them.  My favorite was the lady sitting courtside and "over-laughing" at every comment the guy made.  Each successive comment would send her into hysterical convulsions.  Highly entertaining.

7.  Mavs Dancers.  Enough said.

6.  Grant Hill trying to "bow-up" to Dirk.  I'm not sure what that was all about.  It seemed really out of character for Grant (you know, because I know him so well).  It inspired a hockey fight type reaction from the crowd. 

5.  Eric making it through Day 1 of his I'm-giving-up-alcohol-for-lint experiment.  I put the over/under at 13 days.  The true test will be St. Patty's Day, if he makes it that far.  Good luck E.  I'm rooting for ya.

4.  Getting to sit that close to Steve Nash.  That guy is awesome.  I could go on and on about why I like Steve Nash but I won't.  Perhaps that will be another blog.  Watching him continue to dominate even though he is 36 has made me seriously consider giving up sugar.  Ok, I considered it.  Life without chocolate chip cookies is not worth living.   

3. Watching Trevor contribute about 50% of all concession sales last night.  This is what he consumed:

• Beer
• Chicken Tacos
• Barbecue Sandwich
• Ice cream

And he begged me to get him another ice cream sundae.  Apparently after assaulting his stomach with this combo, he didn't feel good when we returned home.  Go figure.

2. Ed screaming at Jason Witten as he walked by, "Jason! I love you!"  Jason responded with a half-sincere hand gesture.  No, not that hand gesture.  Jason wouldn't do that to a loyal fan.  Casey opined (via text) that it was a "totally acceptable man love moment."  I agree.

1. Trevor screaming at Billy Gillespie, "Drive me home Billy!"  Billy responded with a much more enthusiatic "Hey, somebody recognized me... and likes me!" wave.  I'm 99.9% sure he didn't hear any of Trevor's numerous references to his DWI charges.  Or maybe he was just too drunk to care.  When someone asked why he was here, trevor responded with, "because someone drove him and offered him free booze."  Nice.

Great night.

This Bud's For You...

This Bud's for you Mr. Gym Zit-Popper Guy.  Let me preface this entry by stating that I enjoy popping a zit as much as the next guy... well, probably more.  And I have also probably been guilty of popping a zit at the gym.  You know it happens.  As you are trying to discreetly watch other people in the never-ending funhouse mirrors on the wall, you see a zit on your arm or shoulder and quickly pop it.  No big deal.

What I witnessed last night at the gym was such a blatant diregard for gym zit-popping etiquette, I had half a mind to go drop a 50lb dumbell on his toe.  While I was deadlifting the weight equivalent of a Toyota Prius, I glanced around the weight room and immediately spotted the perpetrator.  He was standing in the middle of the weight room (not in the locker room where his actions may have been overlooked) with his arm contorted behind his back like he was Houdini in a muscle shirt.  His left arm was reaching all the way across his body to attack the volcano on his right shoulder and his neck was so strained he looked like he was doing his best owl impression.

Now this is where Zit-Popping Etiquette (ZPE) comes in.  In order for me to let him get away with the gym zit pop, the following criteria must be met:

1. The zit must be in a position where you can easily get to it.  No back zits.  And you defintiely can't approach the gym mirror like it is the one above your bathroom sink. 
2. It must be a small zit.  No giant ones that will ooze or even spray when popped.
3. The entire process can take no longer than 3 seconds.

What I saw was a direct violation of the three main ZPE laws.  As I said, he was contorted, meaning the zit was not in a acceptable area.  The zit was huge and I think he popped it more than once.  The whole ordeal went on for 30-45 seconds.  I can't say for certain how long it lasted b/c I watched in utter disbelief for a while before I started timing it.  He then wiped his hands on his shorts, checked the wound in the mirror, and grabbed the handle on the cable machine.  All I can say is I wish I had video.  I was tempted to grab the spray bottle of disinfectant and a towel and hand it to him.  But I didn't.  I chose to laugh to myself when a girl eagerly grabbed the handle when he was done.

So this Bud' for you Mr. Gym Zit-Popper Guy.  Thanks for making my trip to the gym last night much more entertaining.

Scottsdale Golf Trip

I stepped up to the 16th tee at the TPC Scottsdale on a perfect, 70 degree, cloudless, Sunday afternoon last weekend.  The grandstands completely encompassed the 150 yard Par 3 that is dubbed the "loudest hole in golf."  They had begun building the stands that would house the most highly attended PGA Tour event of the year in December, 3 months before the tournament.  The crowd, consisting of my Dad, our forecaddie Chris, Franco the real estate investor from Calgary, and his wife Haley, attempted to replicate the sounds of the 20,000 person crowd that would fill the seats in little over a month.  Chris informed us that during the FBR Open, an event that over 500,000 people attend, fans will regularly boo and heckle the golfers on this hole.  When the players enter through a tunnell, fans will sing the fight song of the players respective university.  With a crowd of 4 and few uninterested birds and rabbits, I was still nervous.  The thought of hitting a shot in front of 20,000 innebriated spectators waiting to boo even an average shot is beyond me.

Here is a video of one pro on the wrong end of the fans boos:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdgFLrSoaCE

So I grabbed my 8 iron, placed the ball on the tee, and tried to think about the tips the golf pro had given me during my one-hour lesson the afternoon before.  I made sure my grip was correct and addressed the ball nervously, shifting my weight back forth from one foot to the other trying to get comfortable.  I took the club straight back and tried to focus on pushing the club through with my right hand on the downswing (all things the pro had taught me).  I made great contact and watched the ball take off.  I could hear the crowd erupt in my mind with multiple "GET IN THE HOLE" cheers.  The ball landed pin high about 15 ft from the hole, a shot that probably would have drawn more boos than cheers during the tournament.  SUCCESS!

I stepped up to the green and two putted, something that I only did a few times the whole round, leaving me with a par on one of the most famous holes in golf!  I won't say what my score was for the day, but I can't wait to watch the tournament and criticize eveyone who makes worse than par with a snide, "Hell, even I parred that hole."

It's Just Not Fair...

It's another normal day at work and I am trying my best to pass the time by doing anything at all other than my work. My day usually starts like this:

8:25 - roll in

8:29 - pray there are donuts in the breakroom

8:30 - curse b/c there are no donuts in the breakroom, only the same crappy coffee

8:31 - make a new pot of coffee b/c some jackass took the last of it, didn't start a new batch, and says, "good morning" as he walks out. dick.

8:45 - computer finally gets booted and I check the usual sites (yahoo finance, bloomberg, espn)

9:00 - time for round two on the coffee

9:15 - check e-mail

9:16 - get tired of checking e-mail and go back to browsing the web

9:17 - too much coffee, gotta pee

9:20 - google "jobs that are better than mine"

9:21 - find this site http://www.oddee.com/item_96855.aspx

rest of the day - wish I was a waterslide tester

New Year!

2010 is here. The end of a decade. The 2000's were a very important decade for me and I have been doing a lot of reflecting. It's crazy to think that in the last 10 years I graduated from high school, graduated from college, and got a job in the "real world." I don't think any other decade in my life will produce as much change as this one did. The difference between 14 and 24 is huge. Teen to adult. Puberty to professional. Soccer balls to electricity bills.

Anyway, I found a post in a blog that has a useful outline to conducting a plan for the upcoming year. Here it is:

http://chrisguillebeau.com/3x5/2009-annual-review-overview-and-outline/

I have been working on it for a few days now and have found it hugely beneficial. One of my goals is to improve my writing skills by writing on my blog at least once a month. So here it is, my first post of the New Year. Hopefully there will be more and they will be worth reading.

Why are all the sportswriters I enjoy reading from Boston??

I am a lot like this guy, which I guess, is why I like this article. I hate everybody that doesn't play for one of my teams. I constantly root for the underdog and pray for the worst for anyone else. Anyway, I more or less agree with this guys picks... except for McNabb. I hate him.

http://www.mensjournal.com/nine-guys-i-dont-hate

Attention Parrotheads:

Jimmy is coming to Dallas on April 18th. This is one of the most fun concerts I have ever been to. People tailgate harder for Buffett concerts than for most football games. Where else can you drink tequila out of a squirt gun, suck some heads, go shot for shot with a 65 year old man, ride a motorized cooler, and hang with landsharks? I'm telling you, if you haven't been, you really need to.